December has been a relatively tumultuous month. I have never before missed work or been so sick I needed to. I have never spent back-to-back nights in adjacent ER beds or had the distinct knowlegde of IV needles to be able to discuss in great detail my favorite ways to be administered IV fluids. I have never had to bail on a workshop for a show about Christmas or put myself first in any tremendous way. And now I have a collection of out-patient bracelets to rival Carrie Bradshaw's designer duds. But I'm finding more and more to love about the little month that keeps trying to beat me up.
Dear NYU Langone Cobble Hill,
Thanks for laughing at my jokes. For bringing me Ricardo, who double dressing-gowned me for privacy, and for doing minimal damage to the veins in my left arm.
Dear Baby Goats,
You threw me a birthday surprise! Just as this whole sickness was rearing up, you made me feel like I mattered in such a tremendous way. I will never forget and never throw away my giant poster.
Dear Charlotte's Web,
You brought tears to my eyes and a pre-show that was so fun to put together. Thanks for the popped-balloons and the polaroids, and the pie.
Where you at!?
I see you (especially the giant kind and the kind The Boy eats for you).
You are very tough to keep down. Why not work on that?
Why can't you be pretty when I'm sick, like other girls?
I could get used to you.
Dear Fuzzy Santa Socks,
Thanks for getting me through the worst nights. Time to get you into the laundry now.
Dear Tab Open on my Computer for Mulled Wine,
There will come a time when I can just make large quantities of you and tell myself that nothing is more important than staying warm.
Dear Ice Skating,
You always make me feel like I'm a little more graceful and a little more in love.
The lady at Bryant Park said "YOLO" so I will be taking lots of you.
Dear Christmas Trees,
You're festive and I want you in my home.
You are the soundtrack for everything. Seeing you in person did so much inspiring and a whole lot of soul searching. Some days I think I know where I'm supposed to be. And, just like that, I want to pick up a guitar and sing something.
Dear Birthday Month,
Now that there are two to celebrate over two days, I feel like my prayers have been answered. You sure know how to do birthday crowns and candles.
This is Me:
My name's Melissa. I'm the girl with her hands in her journal.